badr

Elfing myself

Sunday, January 4th, 2009
by badr

Weather in PR vs Weather in the States

Wednesday, December 31st, 2008
by badr

I just sent this mail to DarkSoul who is freezing in the states, because I like to be an obnoxious motherfucker:

“beautiful day in here… 83 degrees blue crisp skies. the only nasty thing should be me, wearing a thong.“

Along with this pictures:

And this is his response:

“OMFG I hate you so much! I hope your plane crash when you come back to the states!!!

*looking at the pictures*

GODDAMN IT I hate you soooo mcuh!!!! >:( “

Sometimes DarkSoul reminds me of Eric Cartman in Southpark, when you argue with the guy you get to hate him, but he is so much fun when he is pissed off.

Royal Spanish Language Academy

Wednesday, December 24th, 2008
by badr

My friend Ian Derek Zapata wrote on his blog recently:

“Sabia usted que según la Real Academia Española el uso de la palabra blog es apropiado, porque hasta a los españoles les suena demasiado pendejo decir digibitácora“

Whoever Packaged This Must Have Issues

Saturday, September 27th, 2008
by badr

Hilarious McDonalds Job Application

Saturday, September 27th, 2008
by badr

McDONALDS APPLICATION

This is an actual job application a 17-year-old boy submitted at a McDonald’s fast-food establishment in Florida – and they hired him because he was so honest and funny!

NAME: Greg Bulmash

SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.

DESIRED POSITION: Company’s President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever’s available. If I were in a position to be picky, I wouldn’t be applying here in the first place.

DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that’s not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.

EDUCATION: Yes.

LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.

SALARY: Less than I’m worth.

MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.

REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.

HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.

PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.

DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?

Yes, but they’re better suited to a more intimate environment.

MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER? If I had one, would I be here?

DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS? Of what?

DO YOU HAVE A CAR?

I think the more appropriate question here would be “Do you have a car that runs?”

HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?

I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing house Sweepstakes.

DO YOU SMOKE?

On the job no, on my breaks yes.

WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?

Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I’m the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I’d like to be doing that now.

DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?

Yes – Absolutely.

SIGN HERE: Aries.